Listen. If you haven’t heard Drake’s If You’re Reading This You’re Too Late, you’re missing out, & I’m saying this as a certified “Drake-hater”.

I feel like we (you and I) are still in the “getting to know each other” phase, seeing as I’m new to the website and everything. I want to be as honest and candid as possible in my posts, so it’s only right that I expose myself.

The Twittersphere knows me as a Drake-hater. That’s where the title came from. No, I did not make that up. But little do my followers know, I absolutely adore Drake.

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Most of the time – Secretly.

So much so that I’m sure my closest friends don’t know I rock with him. Like, so secret to the point where you probably wouldn’t have seen me nod my head to any of his tunes in public, but in my car he’s on heavy rotation.

I publicly shamed Marvin’s Room, but if you take a look at my iTunes library, I’m sure it falls within the top 10 of my most played songs.

I’m ashamed that it has gone on for this long. In all fairness, I’ve tried to openly express my love for him a few times, but could never bring myself to. You see, at that time I found myself always ranting about how “snitches get stitches” and I didn’t want to be hypocritical.

Drake is the type of guy to pass you on the 405 and write a song about it. The whole world would know your license plate number, make and model of your car, and how you rode in the carpool lane solo-dolo. (And if you’re unfamiliar with carpool lanes, it’s totally illegal to drive in it if you don’t have passengers and the cops will write you a big, fat ticket.)

So Drake just snitched on you.

The Po’s have all the information they need and your citation is in the mail.

Thank him later.

He’s that type of guy. He has all the tea and isn’t afraid to spill it. But deep down you have to appreciate him for it, because it’s the truth.

See how I’m torn?

That’s what makes his music so annoyingly good. He talks about real-life events, and you can count on him to give you the real-time facts.

I believe that You & The 6 is an actual phone conversation that he had with his mom – dramatic pauses and everything.

I believe that Drake truly ran through the 6 with his overwhelming woes.

I believe that he was, in fact, lonely on that particular Wednesday night.

I believe that he has a young lady whom he should propose to, but they’re just on different pages right now. They always fight about his love for strippers. It’s depressing.

He’s an open book and we know all of his business. Usually, I’d praise an artist for their sincerity, but Drake makes it hard to respect his hustle. At times he can be a little “too honest” and divulge a little “too much”.

He reminds me of this guy I knew in middle school who used to write me poems all the time. He didn’t place them on my desk for me to read while he wasn’t around, like any normal prepubescent teen. No. He’d wait by my locker to hand them to me. Face to face. Hand in hand. I remember his poetry making me cringe. I thought he was whack, but I appreciated his art. He irritated the heck out of me, making me want to avoid him every open chance I got, but I respected his morality.

Drake’s talent is so authentic it’s annoying. Dependable – forthrightness is his brand. You want to hate him for his tattle-telling rhymes, but you respect him because you know he’s more than likely telling the truth.

And that’s annoying.

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